A page from Trump’s journal.
CIS v2: Finally, a better Commonwealth—everyone’s saying it’s tremendous, much better than Russia’s CIS.
Canada First: Acquire Canada peacefully (they’ll thank me later), tapping into their endless syrup reserves.
Hockey Diplomacy: Control global hockey—everyone knows who controls hockey controls the ice.
Maple Wall: Build a wall of maple trees along the northern border; Canada pays, obviously.
Politeness as Strategy: Canadians handle diplomacy; no one argues with someone apologizing constantly.
Russia Impressed: Even Putin says, “This was my idea, but Trump made it better—fantastic!”
Next step: Greenland—because we all know how much I love Greenland.
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